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And there’s the Wolf ( Bad Bunny), a young man decked out in gauche cartel-chic couture who, once upon a time, lost his bride on a very bloody wedding day and has vengeance on his mind, too. He’s been tipped off the bastard who did the deed is on the train, which turns out to be an ambush by the Prince (Joey King), a snarky teen with her own respective plan for payback.
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Plus there’s Kimura ( Warrior‘s Andrew Koji), a yakuza’s son whose own young boy is in the hospital after being pushed off a roof. Worse, when the citrus-y pair return to their seats after searching for it, there’s a corpse waiting for them. They must hand over both to Dad’s cronies at one of the stops. One massacre of either 16 or 17 people later - the exact number is disputed, and thus requires an elaborate flashback counting off murders to settle the argument - Lemon and Tangerine leave with both the manchild and the money.
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This bickering duo had been hired to retrieve the kidnapped son (Logan Lerman) of a notorious, feared Russian gangster known as “White Death.” That coveted case contains his ransom money. The latter is just your run-of-the-mill asshole. The former adheres to a philosophy based on Thomas the Tank Engine, complete with archetype breakdowns and sticker sheets. They’re Lemon (Brian Tyree Henry) and Tangerine (Aaron Taylor-Johnson), a pair of idiosyncratic British hit men whose reputation precedes them. What could go wrong?įor starters, there are the two men transporting the item. Grab a briefcase - it’s got a sticker on the handle, you can’t miss it. Get on the bullet train heading out of Tokyo, the disembodied voice on his phone tells him. His handler, Maria, has started him off on something simple. Thanks to some time off and therapy, however, he’s ready to roll again. He’s had some bad luck on a few jobs, which has given him a bit of a Job complex he’s convinced some higher power has cursed him for reasons unknown.
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At the center of it all - in more ways than one - is Ladybug, a professional killer coming off a personal funk. A candy-colored concoction of carnage with a substantial body count and even higher empty-calorie count, director David Leitch and screenwriter Zak Olkewicz’s attempt to weave the book’s intersecting narratives into a singular piece of pulp fiction has a tendency to jump the rails at regular intervals.
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The man has not just aged well, he’s aged perfectly for the screen.Īnd Pitt can still carry the weight of a movie on those protein-shake shoulders, which is good, because Bullet Train needs a lot of carrying. It’s been three decades since a walking, talking abs-delivery-service sauntered into Thelma and Louise.
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What connects them is a performer who’s figured out exactly how to use an autumnal presence to his advantage without pandering or playing things up.
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Peruse the past seven years’ worth of acting work: neo-vanity projects ( By the Sea) and old-school star vehicles ( Allied), the lows ( War Machine) and the nosebleed highs ( Ad Astra and Once Upon a Time in Hollywood, in the same year!). But it’s that last guy, the just-shy-of-sixtysomething Hollywood elder, who keeps edging his way into this particular spotlight. You get every single one of them in Bullet Train, the ballistics-and-whistles blockbuster adaptation of Kotaro Isaka’s 2010 crime novel about a commuter train filled with killers there’s a lot of Brad for your buck here. Or rather, the whole repertory company of Brad Pitts - the leading man who chased kooky character-actor roles, the matinee idol who stopped worrying and learned to love movie stardom, the wild-card outlier, the endlessly snacking comic relief, the grungy sex symbol, the All-American Adonis next door, the A-list veteran who lets his supernova aura do the talking.
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